Book Club Session Review: Relaxation
Our goal is to develop a philosophy of balance and humility, which is Realism. When we become realists, we develop balanced habits. We become our best selves, and when we are our best selves we relax. This book study was an exploration of Dr. Low’s writings on relaxation.
In 2023, the book studies focused on Dr. Low’s three main philosophies, which are self-deceptive romanticism and intellectualism, and realism. Dr. Low described them this way: If you coddle your feelings, you are a romantic; if you pamper your thoughts, you are an intellectual. A realist, on the other hand, doesn’t let his thoughts and feelings conflict with the reality of what’s going on. The full quote is in Realism, Romanticism, Intellectualism, chapter 5 of MHTWT on pages 74-75.
I had a friend who used to talk about his thoughts leading him down the rabbit hole. Have you ever felt like that? That’s what romanticism and intellectualism do. Rather than keeping a realistic view of situations we coddle our thoughts and pamper our feelings and get lost in a painful story inside our heads. As a result we become tense and get symptoms. This is a bad habit! All of our book studies have been about changing bad habits through the practice of Dr. Low’s method.
Three mindful tips from Dr. Low for curing our nervous symptoms.
1. Read
Dr. Low wanted people to study outside of meetings. In his lectures he recommended reading Mental Health Through Will Training. Recovery International has also published Manage Your Fears Manage Your Anger and Selections from Dr. Low’s Works. Everything in these book study sessions is right out of these three books. You can purchase any of these books or the shiny new workbook, Better Mental Health for Everyone, online at Amazon or by phone by calling Recovery International Tuesdays and Thursdays at 1-866-221-0302 toll-free or 1-312-337-5661. Click on the links above to purchase.
2. Go to meetings
In Mental Health Through Will Training, page 406 a patient had a setback, and Dr. Low pointed out that this was because of failing to attend meetings.
3. Daily Practice
By reading and going to meetings, we sharpen our awareness of the thought habits that trip us up. With this awareness, the moment we notice these thoughts coming into our heads, we can stop them and change course before we get tense. Our goal is to be able to catch these thoughts the minute they pop up, and discern whether they are realistic. If they aren’t, we can change our thoughts in real time to realistic thoughts. If we do that, we can avoid the tenseness that causes symptoms. Then we can stay relaxed throughout the day.
Dr. Low said that the cure is when we don’t have symptoms or they are fleeting or brief. See Manage Your Fears, Manage Your Anger on page 124.
So how do we get to the cure?
Realism and Relaxation
"In Recovery [the patient] is instructed that his warped attitude is caused by a distorted, unrealistic philosophy. To cure a nervous patient means to change his mental attitude, that is, to make him drop his romanticisms and intellectualisms and to substitute a realistic outlook. If this is accomplished, a mental attitude of self-trust is installed, and the physical and mental tools of the body can then aim straight at their goals, without fear, without self-consciousness, without morbid preoccupation.”
From Bodily Tools and Mental Attitudes, in Selections from Dr. Low’s Works, page 48
Perfection is a Hope, Dream and Illusion
We don’t have to go into immediate Realism every time as soon as the incident happened. Recovery doesn’t preach perfection! Perfection was a hope, dream and illusion for Dr. Low’s patients as well. So it’s OK if we spend some time deceiving ourselves with Romanticism or Intellectualism and then switch to Realism. With practice we will get better at it until one day we notice we don’t even have symptoms. And we can RELAX.
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